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So, as she readied Apiary for its recent opening there, she and other managers told servers not to sweat that sort of thing.

Would anyone really care? Yes, as Ms. Moon said she learned when reading a customer comment card one night. But she did tell servers that they could and should start considering gender, at least sometimes.

A broad generalization? Certain musty rites — lrder from one perspective, chauvinistic from another — have faded or disappeared.

What your wine says about you - Thrillist

But most restaurateurs concede that women disproportionately end up there, whether by request or reflex. All of that is taken into consideration when menus are written, rooms are painted and thermostats set. They tend to dress with more skin showing.

Men rarely ask me about lighting. Women more often ask if a menu has leaner, healthier options. Men more often ask if they can get a decent steak.

At the Greenwich Village restaurant Cru, decorated in clubby brown tones and distinguished by a wine list that lets high rollers rack up breathtaking bills, I spotted more men than women. At Otto, designed to be more approachable, with less swagger, as many as 70 percent of the crowd is female, Mr.

I Search Sexy Chat Dinner wine and sex in no particular order

Batali said. At Babbo, men have an edge.

A man is more likely to care about being greeted rapturously and treated like an insider, according to the restaurateurs and servers I interviewed. A woman is more likely to take offense if the restrooms are cramped, ugly and messy. Chris Cannon, a principal owner of Alto and Convivio, said he thinks of Alto as his male restaurant. And its Dinneer are disproportionately male.

25 Things You Should Always Do at a Fancy Restaurant | Best Life

View all New York Times newsletters. He thinks of Convivio as his female restaurant. By a slight margin, women outnumber men there. The front room was initially painted mint green. Although many restaurateurs are happy to appeal to one gender more than the other, Mr.

Abrams said he was concerned that he was losing potential business, and he recently made adjustments to court men. Many steakhouses have traveled in the opposite direction. In truth, ordering disparities between men and women may be narrower than ever.

Old Gender Roles With Your Dinner? - The New York Times

Restaurateurs I interviewed noted that more men than ever veer toward salads, and that low-carbohydrate diets have nudged more women toward generous cuts of red meat. And in restaurants that cater to the most fervent food enthusiasts and most intrepid food amd, women and men in equal numbers stare down fatty slabs of braised short rib parrticular get warm and fuzzy about lamb hearts and veal tongue.

But elsewhere, distinctions persist. Assumptions, too.

When I dined a few months ago at the restaurant Forge, in TriBeCa, the two women at my table were given one kind of amuse-bouche, while a male companion and I were given another. Starr said. Beyond Apiary, most upscale restaurants still seem to hew to the traditional etiquette of attending to the se at a table before the men.

But these same restaurants endorse and encourage a less traditional approach in other ways. Make sure you go to the right person.

A Dinnfr composed entirely of women may receive the most unequal treatment of all, because some servers may see it as a less profitable opportunity. Women eat and stick around. Women are more verbal than men. As a consequence, Mr.

Although many restaurants continue to make distinctions between the sexes, most at least intend to be more sensitive to anything that smacks of gender discrimination than in the past.

10 of My Favorite Wines of | Bon Appétit

And many servers, particularly in restaurants popular with young diners, are less influenced by gender than ever. She was speaking primarily as a diner.

Five years ago, she said, she often had to fight to get servers to let her be the point person for a group of men and women dining together. Servers had a stubborn tropism toward the men. DeLozier said. Tell us what you think.

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